Besides seeing a lot more tall buildings and a lot fewer cows, I've noticed one major difference between home and the Windy City. Here in Chicago, people live a completely different lifestyle. Before I thought it was just fast paced, but seeing it up close, I know there's a little more to it. People here live in a outgoing way that you just don't see in laid-back Idaho, even with the rednecks during a truck race. Vibrancy in life is displayed in such and open way that makes the city an exciting place to be. You can almost feel it. It's interesting because Chicago is known for it's danger level and crime records in that environment, but when I see lives like that - so full and robust and compare it to my own slow, more reserved life, I sometimes wonder what I might be missing out on.
But I think most of you are probably wondering what happened with my aforementioned "meeting the biological family" outing. I had a really good time, as did everyone else I think. We actually spent quite a bit of time with the family and all got along really well. We're all really alike actually. Genes definitely carry more than facial features with them. I think there's a good future there for all of us. My cousins and I could turn out to be good friends.
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
Monday, June 16, 2014
Dads
Sorry this is late. It was meant to be for Fathers' Day, but this is what happens when you're traveling: things get a little behind sometimes.
A lot of people are angry about what dads are becoming, but that's all the more reason to celebrate the good ones. Maybe if we start appreciating what dads are supposed to be a little more, men will start stepping up and becoming good dads a little more too. You might not have a personal vendetta against dads; maybe you have a great dad that you're thankful for and have accidentally been pulled along with society in forgetting to tell him. Whatever the case, if you have a dad that does anything right and/or sometimes hard by you, get up and thank him for it as soon as you're finished reading. (If your having a hard time thinking of something, here's this):
I want to give a shout-out to dads, cause they're important and amazing too. Dads are responsible for providing for you. They make sure your mom has the food she needs to feed you, and that you have a safe and warm place to sleep at night. They find time to go to work, take care of the house, the yard, and probably the pets too, make sure your mom has everything she needs, and hang out with you. They lead you in your spiritual walk with God, and manage their own. They teach you the skills of life: how to throw and catch, how to go camping, how to fix the plumbing under the sink. If you're his daughter, he teaches you how to be a lady by respecting you and treating you like any gentleman should. If you're his son, he teaches you how to be a man by modeling his treatment of others. He plays games with you, makes sure you get to bed on time, goes to your activities, and sometimes he gives you gifts just to let you know you're special to him. He punishes you to make sure you grow up into a person of character. He smiles and laughs with you, and shares your joy. He cries with you, even if you can't see it on the outside, every time your heart breaks your dad's breaks with you. Your dad is there for you when you need him, and gives you space when you want him to. He knows you, and he likes you.
That's a pretty big list, describing a pretty outstanding dad, and a really hard one to come by. But if your dad is even half that list, I'm telling you, you have a Great dad. Don't under-appreciate him for everything he does. And here's a quick shout out to single dads. You're Amazing! You are both parents to your kids, and you do an amazing job. If you have a single dad, then you have been given an amazing gift. You have a dad who gives up every day to be your parent because he loves you more than anything, and he deserves double the praise. Remember I said that I wanted you to get up and thank your dad for something he does right by you? If for some crazy reason you're still having a hard time saying something specific, then just go thank him for being your dad, period, and tell him that you love him, cause that says it all.
Thank you, Dad! I love you.
A lot of people are angry about what dads are becoming, but that's all the more reason to celebrate the good ones. Maybe if we start appreciating what dads are supposed to be a little more, men will start stepping up and becoming good dads a little more too. You might not have a personal vendetta against dads; maybe you have a great dad that you're thankful for and have accidentally been pulled along with society in forgetting to tell him. Whatever the case, if you have a dad that does anything right and/or sometimes hard by you, get up and thank him for it as soon as you're finished reading. (If your having a hard time thinking of something, here's this):
I want to give a shout-out to dads, cause they're important and amazing too. Dads are responsible for providing for you. They make sure your mom has the food she needs to feed you, and that you have a safe and warm place to sleep at night. They find time to go to work, take care of the house, the yard, and probably the pets too, make sure your mom has everything she needs, and hang out with you. They lead you in your spiritual walk with God, and manage their own. They teach you the skills of life: how to throw and catch, how to go camping, how to fix the plumbing under the sink. If you're his daughter, he teaches you how to be a lady by respecting you and treating you like any gentleman should. If you're his son, he teaches you how to be a man by modeling his treatment of others. He plays games with you, makes sure you get to bed on time, goes to your activities, and sometimes he gives you gifts just to let you know you're special to him. He punishes you to make sure you grow up into a person of character. He smiles and laughs with you, and shares your joy. He cries with you, even if you can't see it on the outside, every time your heart breaks your dad's breaks with you. Your dad is there for you when you need him, and gives you space when you want him to. He knows you, and he likes you.
That's a pretty big list, describing a pretty outstanding dad, and a really hard one to come by. But if your dad is even half that list, I'm telling you, you have a Great dad. Don't under-appreciate him for everything he does. And here's a quick shout out to single dads. You're Amazing! You are both parents to your kids, and you do an amazing job. If you have a single dad, then you have been given an amazing gift. You have a dad who gives up every day to be your parent because he loves you more than anything, and he deserves double the praise. Remember I said that I wanted you to get up and thank your dad for something he does right by you? If for some crazy reason you're still having a hard time saying something specific, then just go thank him for being your dad, period, and tell him that you love him, cause that says it all.
Thank you, Dad! I love you.
Friday, June 13, 2014
Onward To Chicago
I can't believe a whole week has passed already since I left for Ohio. We spent a great week here with my aunt, and now it's time to move on. Next stop: Chicago. I'm doing something scary, and fun. Tomorrow night I'll meet my dad's birth family. Neither of us have ever met anyone in that part of the family face-to-face. It's very new for everyone.
I'm very excited though. My biological family is very classically structured. My grandmother (dad's birth mom) is still around, I have one uncle and two aunts, and three cousins - two of them (boys) are my age within a couple of months, and one (girl) is four years younger than me. It's the family I always wanted growing up. My dad's adopted family is wonderful, and there are a lot of relatives, but they're all very extended and my sister and I are the only children for the last generation. I'm really looking forward to meeting and having some more closely related family around. Tomorrow night we'll all be having dinner somewhere with "authentic Chicago pizza" and meet everyone for the first time. I really hope my cousins and I get along well. It would be so wonderful to have some cousins my own age to mess around with!
May all my conversation and actions be a testimony and uplifting to the LORD.
I'm very excited though. My biological family is very classically structured. My grandmother (dad's birth mom) is still around, I have one uncle and two aunts, and three cousins - two of them (boys) are my age within a couple of months, and one (girl) is four years younger than me. It's the family I always wanted growing up. My dad's adopted family is wonderful, and there are a lot of relatives, but they're all very extended and my sister and I are the only children for the last generation. I'm really looking forward to meeting and having some more closely related family around. Tomorrow night we'll all be having dinner somewhere with "authentic Chicago pizza" and meet everyone for the first time. I really hope my cousins and I get along well. It would be so wonderful to have some cousins my own age to mess around with!
May all my conversation and actions be a testimony and uplifting to the LORD.
Thursday, June 12, 2014
Reasons To Wear Modest Clothing
Bikini Facts That Will Probably Blow Your Mind
I was very impressed with this young lady's speech. It reminds me of a friend of mine and her business too. I was against girls and women wearing bikinis, and other immodest articles of clothing already, but this just cemented it in. Some of these facts were just appalling.
Reasons To Wear Modest Clothing --Your Sensitive Side: "Brain scans showed that when men are shown pictures of scantily-clad screwdrivers and hammers lit up. Some men showed zero brain activity in the medial pre-frontal cortex, which is the part of the brain that lights up when one ponders a person's thoughts, feelings, and intentions... It's as if they are reacting to these women as if they are NOT FULLY HUMAN. It's consistent with the idea that they are responding to OBJECTS, not PEOPLE." It is built in to us ladies to want emotional connection with any future male companions. The way we dress definitely affects the way men think about us, and while some may think that it's the "only way to get a man" or some other such thing, and that they will come to a place of love and connection as a natural result of everything else, in reality all they will be doing is turning off the part of the brain that makes it possible. Wearing modest clothing and swimsuits actually makes men more biologically capable of connecting with you.
Empowerment: Modesty gives you status. When you set up boundaries and standards that you are willing to uphold in all situations, you will be seen as someone worth RESPECTING. "You will be seen as an EQUAL, in CONTROL, and be TAKEN SERIOUSLY." If a man doesn't respect you for your modesty, then he is not one you you should want to worry about anyway. "It seems the kind of power [women] are searching for is more attainable when they dress modestly."
It's Fashionable: Most women, especially in the younger crowd think that modesty means "I have to be frumpy, and dumpy, and out of fashion... and I imagine myself sitting alone in my living room, never going on another date ever again, and never getting married." And it's frustrating shopping once having made the decision to dress modestly, especially with swimwear, because everything in the store these days seems to be tailored to those who want to "tell everything about a girl except her mother's maiden name" or something my grandmother would wear. The truth is though, you can dress modestly without sacrificing fashion. The CLASSIEST, most TIMELESS, FASHIONABLE clothing of all time has been modest costumes. Nobody ever remembers the costumes and clothes that make girls look like tramps; they do remember the clothes that make female bodies look like ladies. "Modesty isn't about covering up our bodies because they're bad. Modesty isn't about hiding ourselves. It's about revealing our DIGNITY."
He Said So: The most important reason of all, is that God told us to carry ourselves in a way that would glorify Him. "We were made beautiful in His image and likeness." We shouldn't be afraid to display our femininity and beauty, but that doesn't mean giving our bodies away to others to receive gratification for it. The question isn't will you look BEAUTIFUL or UGLY; the question is how will you use your beauty?
Monday, June 9, 2014
All Things
The truth is I'm a little scared. I've spent the last two years learning that being scared is okay. Now I just have to accept that I'm going to be. I find myself so often caught up in my own mistakes, and whether or not I'm about to make any more, that sometimes I forget that those are okay too. But it doesn't feel okay does it? Mistakes are probably the thing I least look forward to in life. I'm always worried that somehow I'm going to mess up not just my life but also others' lives around me. I take risks, and over-think the consequences. I don't doubt that God will use my broken mess for His beautiful glory, but I'd rather He used my whole and clean self instead. I have to balance the fear and the respect of danger with letting go and letting God handle it by remembering that I can't mess up His plans - No. Matter. What. God's grace flows most freely through the broken places, and my weaknesses uniquely equip me to carry his mercy and message to others. And all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28). For He calls all who love Him, not just the "qualified", whole and clean; He qualifies the called. Sometimes I just have to stop worrying, wondering, and doubting, and have faith that things that will work out: All things, even my messes, because I can't mess up His plans, and He has my best in His deepest heart.
Saturday, June 7, 2014
My Nothing For Granted
This morning was a bustle of activity trying to finish packing and make sure we were all prepared for the 30-hour trip to Ohio. During which I experienced something completely new. I'm not sure there's a name for it, but there should be, because I know it's a common condition among the female nation, just usually not my age. Since my parents' divorce, the house my dad and I moved into has become very much my own. I now say, my kitchen, my house, my table, and the like, versus a simple "the". I suppose that taking the title has caused me to take more substantial responsibility for it. In my home I felt the overwhelming urge to make everything perfect for the house sitters that were coming, not leaving a speck of dust out of place; and as I left my darling pets I felt as if I were leaving children: not willing to leave either house nor occupants to anyone else's care but my own. But I did. I overcame it, somewhat, and left, as was my current responsibility to do. It was so bitter-sweet.
The rest of the day has been nothing but wonderful. I've spent it singing with my dad in the car for hours, coming up with names for some of the newest editions to my two-legged family, and enjoying the beautiful scenery that God has been so good to provide in these western states. I've been in a state that I've been missing for a year, I've talked with some people I love dearly, and I've taken nothing for granted. How can I possibly!? What's mine isn't mine and I have no right to it, but I still get to enjoy it. It's such a beautiful life He's given to such a wretched sinner...
The rest of the day has been nothing but wonderful. I've spent it singing with my dad in the car for hours, coming up with names for some of the newest editions to my two-legged family, and enjoying the beautiful scenery that God has been so good to provide in these western states. I've been in a state that I've been missing for a year, I've talked with some people I love dearly, and I've taken nothing for granted. How can I possibly!? What's mine isn't mine and I have no right to it, but I still get to enjoy it. It's such a beautiful life He's given to such a wretched sinner...
Wednesday, June 4, 2014
Real Talk
It's funny... Okay, actually it's sad. You can be so sure you know what someone is thinking and then find out you're completely wrong. You can build up whole ideas around what you think you know, and then they will crumble around you. I wish more than anything that there could be more honest and real talking communication between people. I wish I had that with people. Friends can lose touch, for a myriad of reasons, so easily now, and no one talks. What ever happened to loyalty? To trust? Did things always happen this fast, or did I just start noticing what was important too late?
All I can say is, don't stop talking. Ever. It's just opening a door to a world of hurt, misunderstandings, and loss. And don't take it for granted because who knows, the last time you talked could have been your last chance. Don't leave anything unsaid, like, "I love you" or "I miss you". And don't say anything you'll wish you hadn't later; you may not get the chance to fix what you broke.
All I can say is, don't stop talking. Ever. It's just opening a door to a world of hurt, misunderstandings, and loss. And don't take it for granted because who knows, the last time you talked could have been your last chance. Don't leave anything unsaid, like, "I love you" or "I miss you". And don't say anything you'll wish you hadn't later; you may not get the chance to fix what you broke.
Tuesday, June 3, 2014
Summer Plans
I spent my last summer serving as a counselor in the camp I've grown up in. For eight weeks I had a totally different life. A whole new family, routine, and responsibilities. I've never been worked harder or pushed to the limit more in my entire life. But it was the most amazing, freeing, exhilarating, and rewarding thing I've ever done. If I could only share with you that look on a camper's face the moment they started to depend on me and trust me. Or the the glee (and terror) I felt when my new brothers and sisters [staff] decided to go after me with pitchers full of water. Or the quiet moment in the staff lounge, early in the morning as the sun greeted us, when a few of us sat quietly reading out Bibles and spending devoted time with God; not speaking, but saying everything, and I got to watch and and enjoy the moment looking through the steam in my perfect cup of coffee.
So many memories are held in that camp. To be honest, I never liked being a camper much, but as part of the staff I had something really special - timeless. I can't describe it to you. I'll hold it close to me forever.
I had planned for some time to go back to Red Cliff Bible Camp this summer. For a while I felt that God wanted me to go back. A dying woman in my church made her last request of me: that I go back. It was a serious calling. But, I became less and less sure of my resolve to go, and I faced two completely different lives to choose between for the summer. Both good lives, both completely within the realm of God's will; which to choose. I doubted whether I should really return to camp, but this was one of the times I couldn't tell the difference between my own nervousness and the Spirit's voice. I knew that I wasn't going to be able to interpret the whispers in my head. I could have gone on worrying and guessing, and made a decision based on what felt right at the moment I had to make it. I prayed, but I didn't pray for God to clear my head, or make His voice louder; I didn't pray for anything that leave me any way in control of the decision. I prayed, "Lord, please give me no option but your will. Either close the door or leave it open. If it's open I'll know I must go, and if it's closed I'll know I must stay. Your will be done." I waited two days to see if the door would remain open, and by the end of the two days it had been shut.
