Never Wonder

I never have to wonder if You know me. 

I never have to wonder if You know my favorite color.
I never wonder if You know my favorite food or flower.
Wonder if You know my favorite songs, or types of books I like to read.I never have to wonder if You know me.


I never have to wonder if You know the history of where I've stood, or where I'd like to stand.
I never wonder if You know my hopes, and dreams, and dreads.
Wonder if You know how I'd like to spend my time if I had the time to spend.I never have to wonder if You know me.


I never have to wonder if You know the real me underneath.
I never wonder if You know whether I'd rather be with people or alone.
Wonder if You know when I'm brave or afraid.


I never have to wonder if You know me.You know when I'm happy, sad, lonely, or overwhelmed; and You step in with me to help me stand strong.
I never wonder if You know whether I'd rather be with people or alone.
Wonder if You know when I'm brave or afraid.

You can tell if I'm really smiling when I'm smiling.When I'd rather cry than act like I'm okay?And You see when I'm left out and ignored. You care. You're never afraid to let the world know it.
I never have to wonder if You know me.

I never have to wonder if You know whether I'd rather wear jeans or dresses.
I never wonder if You know if I like school or play.
Wonder if You know I have a soft side.


I never wonder if You know if I like school or play.
Wonder if You know I have a soft side. 
I never have to wonder if You know me.


I never have to wonder if You know what I'd rather see or what I'd rather hear more than anything else in the world.
I never wonder if You know what I do when I feel like I can't do anything else.
Wonder if You know what makes me happy deep down inside like nothing else does.

I never wonder if You know what I do when I feel like I can't do anything else.
Wonder if You know what makes me happy deep down inside like nothing else does.
I never have to wonder if You know me.

You know me like no other, and I am overwhelmed with your desire to know me every day. 
I know you love me, just the way that I am, because I know you to. 
You accept me totally and yet are never satisfied, knowing that I can be so much better and so much more. 

You know me. All of me. And I never wonder. 

If Anyone Knows Me At All...

I wonder all the time if anyone knows me at all. 

I wonder all the time if anyone knows my favorite color.
I wonder if anyone knows my favorite food or flower.
Wonder if anyone knows my favorite songs, or types of books I like to read.
I wonder all the time if anyone knows me at all. 

I wonder all the time if anyone knows the history of where I've stood, or where I'd like to stand.
I wonder if anyone knows my hopes, and dreams, and dreads.
Wonder if anyone knows how I'd like to spend my time if I had the time to spend.
I wonder all the time if anyone knows me at all.

I wonder all the time if anyone knows the real me underneath. Even if they think they do, do they?
I wonder if anyone knows if I'd rather be with people or alone.
Wonder if anyone knows if I'm brave or afraid. Afraid of them.
I wonder all the time if anyone knows me at all. 

Do they know when I'm happy, sad, lonely, or overwhelmed; and if they did, would they step in with me to help me stand strong?
Can anyone tell if I'm really smiling when I'm smiling?
Do you know when I'd rather cry than act like I'm okay?
Does anyone see when I'm left out and ignored? Do they care? If they do, why are they afraid to say something?

I wonder all the time if anyone knows me at all.

I wonder all the time if anyone knows if I'd rather wear jeans or dresses.
I wonder if anyone knows if I like school or play.
Wonder if anyone knows I have a soft side.
I wonder all the time if anyone knows me at all. 

I wonder all the time if anyone knows what I'd rather see or what I'd rather hear more than anything else in the world.
I wonder if anyone knows what I do when I feel like I can't do anything else.
Wonder if anyone knows what makes me happy deep down inside like nothing else does.
I wonder all the time if anyone knows me at all.

And sometimes I wonder if anyone was brave enough to tell me if they did, or to risk guessing anyway, and tell me...
If anyone knows me at all. 

He Conquered Death, Made A Promise, and I Believe! Happy Easter Everyone!

I have a birthday! Tomorrow, I will have been a new creature for 7 years. There's something special about getting saved on Easter Sunday. I share an anniversary with someone for something great. It's the best day in the world to remember your spiritual birth; simultaneously you're remembering how it's possible.

Let me tell you something about me. I'm often indecisive. Even if I make a decision I think about all the what ifs and wonder later if I really should have made it or not. Now let me tell you something about being saved. Salvation: letting Christ be a part of my life and the whole of my heart: accepting His gift: choosing my Lord over myself: is the only decision I've never wanted to turn back on. Not once have I wondered if I really should have made that decision, or pondered lustfully the life I would have had if I didn't. I know, more securely than with any other I'll ever make, that I made the right decision. I chose the right path. And, oh! I want to rejoice! You know what? I think I will.

You want to know what happened to me when I got saved? How I let myself get so brainwashed that I believe I couldn't survive without trusting in an invisible, all powerful, all knowing, everywhere-all the time God? Listen up!!

You know what happened? God was creative, and imaginative, and beautiful, so He wanted to create something else that was creative, imaginative, and beautiful, that would glorify Him by displaying His handy-work. So He created humans, and He loved them with a love that nothing else has or will ever compare to. He gave them everything they could desire, and made their lives perfect. He gave them power over everything else He created, He gave them the ability to build, create and grow, they lived in the perfect home, and they got to walk and talk with Him whenever they wanted. He gave them everything.

But what happened? They rejected Him. They rejected all God's promises and goodness for satisfying themselves. God should have destroyed them, and started over. There was no reason He should want any more to do with such selfish people, but He loved them too much. He let them live, and while they didn't have all the blessings of their original home and were not allowed to see Him anymore,

He let them live in the world that, even though it was cursed, was beautiful and abounded in blessing.
And he never completely left them.
AND He promised that one day He would give a way for them to come back to Him.

Generation after generation, years upon years, God walked with their descendants. He taught them, fought for them, lead them, loved them, and cared for them. And generation after generation, year upon year, they rejected him, even though every time they did they found out that they really should have listened to Him. God loved them, and wanted them to return to Him, and nothing they did could stop Him from loving them or change His mind.

So you know what He did next? He honored His promise. Jesus came to earth to be with His unruly people, to spend time with them, heal them, and teach them. God came in the flesh to be literally with His people again. He finally told them all what they had to do to escape the sin-cursed world they lived in forever! You know what it was? Believe. All they had to do was believe in Him and they could escape and be with Him forever.

And what happened? They killed Him for it. They didn't just kill Him. They tortured Him. Humiliated the King of Kings that loved them more than anything else. They didn't want to give up making themselves happy 'right now' to let God make the happy forever.

I killed Him.
I rejected Him.
I tortured Him.
I didn't want to belong to God; I wanted to belong to myself! My heart did all these things.

But it wasn't over! The grave couldn't hold Him. Death couldn't keep Him. He rose from the dead victorious!

And more than that, He said that the offer still stood. That even though I'd done all those things to Him, He still loved me too much, and if I only confess my wrong and believe in Him, I didn't have to do anything, He would still freely give me eternal life away from the curse if I wanted it because He loved me too much to let me go without a way to come back to Him. How could He offer grace like that to save a wretch like me!? I would be nuts to not accept an offer like that.

So I did.

But wait! There is STILL MORE! Not only did he offer me: immortality, perfection, everlasting love, and pardon for every crime I'd ever committed and would commit in the future, He promised that He was going to come back again, and next time He'd put the curse to an end forever. He'd conquer it in war so that no one would ever suffer it again, and if I accepted Him, I'd rejoice in victory on the winning side!

I celebrate Easter because I know He conquered death and still offered me a promise, and because I'm looking forward to His return! I celebrate my Salvation Birthday because I know my future's secure in that promise, and because every day I have HOPE and will never wonder or be alone again.

You want to know what makes me think I know all that's really true and He really exists?

Even if you couldn't see proof every single place you look in what He's created; even if you couldn't see the evidence in my life that I'm not living for myself, I have purpose, and peace and joy beyond anything you could possibly imagine; let me tell you this: I know God exist's because He lives inside my heart! And I hear His voice every day! He wrote me a special love letter that never changes and never get's old that I can read whenever I want!

I lived for myself and was never satisfied. I live for Christ and can only desire less. I live out of gratefulness for a gift that I could never imagine giving, that I could never pay for, and want to bring Glory to Him for it every single microscopic moment of every single day!

If I am brainwashed, it is only by the truth. If I am insane it is only because I know the right choice and will not stray from it.

So here it is: I AM a Christian. I identify with Christ, and not the things of this world. I believe the BIBLE: Every Word In It. I believe the person of Jesus Messiah is living, holy, GOD, and I live for Him. I KNOW that He came to earth as a man, lived my life, with my sorrows, my happiness, my love, and my hate, and that He died to save me, a sinner, so that I could be FREE of sin forever and Live as He Lives. 

HALLELUJAH! AMEN!

Happy Birthday to me! I've been saved 7 years. 

And My Whole Being Rejoices...

Dear Bloggers,

I can honestly say that life could not be busier or more wonderful. I have gone through the last several months feeling like a prisoner of my own mind. I guess it's on the extreme end of what most people refer to as the "teenager identity crisis". I never quite understood that, but believe me I know now. But I don't want to talk about that now. I suppose I will sometime, now just isn't that time. It's not precisely that I know exactly who I am, but I seem to have gotten some grasp of it finally, which, I won't lie, gives some new-found security. I have felt in the last couple weeks like a burden has been lifted that has been there a very long time. So long, that I had accepted it and forgotten it was even there. It's not just that identity has been found, but so many things have brightened. Not specifically that events have happened, no; God has retaken a hold of my heart in a way that I haven't felt in a long time. I'm not anywhere near where I should be, or where I want to be, but I'm so much closer than before. And I feel whole. Circumstances that I don't like, and people that drive crazy haven't changed, but I have. My whole perspective has. Psalm 16:9, "Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices!" I am glad. 

So, to life: My life is a bustle of activity. Which, to my deepest regret, is the reason that there have been months between each post recently. But I do love it. I study, I play sports and dance, I attempt to do some gardening, I take pictures and volunteer with kindergartners. Above all, I spend time with my God. There are several other things that I'd like to be doing, but no matter, I can say that my life is complete. 

My dad and I argue, sure, but I feel that our relationship grows every day. He's learning how to be a dad, and I'm learning how to be a daughter. Oh that is a lovely word! Daughter. I never much felt like one, but in the last 6 months I've been able to fill the role more and more each day. I always imagined, but truthfully I never knew in the slightest how absolutely Wonderful it feels to be one. 

My school is still very behind from my first semester setback, but I am making progress on catching it back up, and hopefully with the support of the people around me, I can reach my goal and finish by the end of May where I should. 

Ultimate Frisbee and dancing have given me the opportunity to exercise and the social outlet I've desired for so long. True, I get beat up more than my share, but between you and me, that's one of the parts I like most: the unpredictability and the chance of (somewhat minor) injury is what keeps things interesting and exciting. 

As spring goes on I have an increasing desire to garden a little. A few flowers here and there, and some herbs in the window sill. Time is a constant barrier, and I haven't done much of it before, but I remain both optimistic and determined to get it done. It's a good thing I am good with directions though, or this would most likely turn out to be a mess. 

Photography become more enthralling and exciting with every passing shutter. I am currently working on the biggest project I've ever done that will turn out to be about 100 inches across and 30 high. It's a very large panoramic, pieced together by hundreds of images. I've already spent a week working on it, longer than any single project before, and I hope to be done in the next four days. 

In the meantime, my kindergarten class is budding with romance. I'll set your minds at ease right off; the teachers and I don't have any desire to encourage this behavior and are trying to put a stop to it where we can, but it is so enjoyable to watch them! They really have no idea what the words mean, so it's funny to watch them as they test the waters of "boyfriends" and "girlfriends", which to them means "You're a girl, and I'm a boy, and we're friends." The occasional engagement or marriage will occur, I get to see "blank loves blank" written on the name lines, and other random, but absolutely hysterical moments will arise concerning our class of young lovebirds. The best part of the class though is what I am privileged to see every 11:30 a.m. when I walk through the door: the excited faces that light up and say "Miss Sarah!" and run quickly up to hug me. 

It is easy for me to pick out all the bad things in my life, for there are many, and say "my life is bad", or subsequently, pull out all the good and wonderful things, for there are also many, and say "my life is good". But listen, my life is neither good nor bad. It is simply life, with all it's ups and downs, just like anyone else's; only mine is directed by a beautiful Savior. I will post back and forth on this blog about pains or joys, and find myself completely caught up in however I feel at those moments; but, as I go through life, struggling over what to do for school and college for next year, what dress to put on in the morning, or whether to rescue some baby ducklings: whatever may arise, I want sincerely to keep it all in perspective, as I desire for you to do as well. Trusting my Lord no matter what. 

Living in the Glory of Our Lord Today!
Liz